I am standing in my kitchen stirring Mac and Cheese for dinner (which is already an hour late) looking around and asking myself...would anyone consider you a good mom? This question comes from many discussion blogs that I found today. (By the way...I wasn't searching for the blogs but for a cheaper calendar like Kate's. While I do like the one she has I AM NOT willing to pay $50.00 for one like hers. I just do it...especially since I am at home right now and we only have one income coming in. But anyway...) They weren't talking about whether Kate is a good mom...but this question that keeps getting people into bitter debates with one another.
I think the main part of this discussion deals with two main sides. One side admires Kate and the other loathes her (or have a strong dislike). As I was reading these comments from others on the board I couldn't understand what made people so fired up until it hit me when I was standing in my kitchen. If there were cameras in my house at that very moment what would people say? (Let me paint a picture)...I am in baggie sweats and a tank top standing in a small kitchen in desperate need of a sweeping and mopping. There is a sink full of dishes overflowing onto the counter. I have greased spilled on my counter from food. There are toys scattered about the living room, kitchen, and dining room. I sigh as for the fourth time in the last 20 minutes my 3 year old ask for a drink. I am trying to help my 5 year old read a book meanwhile my 5 month old is crying for me to nurse him. I am fuming at my husband because we just had a fight over whether the kids should be in the kitchen when I am cooking. All the while I have a load of laundry that needed my attention a while ago. My hair is not done and no I haven't had a chance to bathe today. So what does that say about me? Am I a good mom? What would people think of me if they saw that I loose my temper way more than I should (and way more than Kate I might add), make my kids redo their toy baskets (yes I dump the toys out if they are not in the correct bin). Would people think I am over obsessive about certain things and just plain lazy about others?
Which brings me to the heart of many discussions about Kate. Is is abrasive, ocd having b*tch or is she a woman who really is in control (sometimes a bit too much), very organized, and knows how to keep her house in order? Do I admire Kate? I don't know. I watch the show all the time...I am a fan of the show. Do I always agree with how she talks to Jon or what she says about the kids...no...but I am just as guilty of doing that as Kate. I guess I am on the admiring side. Not the get on your knees and worship but a wish I could be at that level admiration. I admire the fact that she has a schedule and ACTUALLY keeps it. (Something I am struggling with and hopefully will get by the end of this month.) I admire that she doesn't procrastinate and gets things done right then and there. (I am a huge procrastinator and I hate that). I love the fact that she is organized. Something I am in the midst of doing. Now can I accomplish everything I just mentioned...sure and then some but its like trying to find the end of a rainbow. I see it but the end is not coming anytime soon. Do I feel the need to worship this woman...no but then again there are people out there that do and I tell them go ahead that's just not me.
I really need to know...what constitutes being a good mom? Is Kate a good mom? Am I, are you? What makes you a good mom?
3 years ago
5 comments:
I feel parenting is not one-size-fits-all. What works for one mom may not work for another or her kids. Feeling secure about your own style actually makes you a better parent when you're not constantly "trying on" other moms' methods thinking they are better. When you're confident and in your parenting, kids know what's expected of them, and they learn to trust you and feel safe and loved. When you go with what you know is right for your child, it will make you the best possible parent. IMO
Get out of my head lol. We must be unorganized, procrastinating, soul sisters. I know exactly how you feel and have often wondered what the critical commenters would think of me.
Kate Gosselin is anal, Type-A and all that nasty stuff that everyone hates because she has to be. Imagine if she wasn't? Her house would fall into chaos and disarray!
But she's a good mom. An awesome mom, really. She provides for her children and you can tell that they love her too, especially in the episode Mr Mom where Jon gets out the camera and films them saying what they want to Kate? The haters can say it's scripted, but you can feel the love they have for Kate.
I'm not a mom yet, but I think that as long as you provide for your children, love them, hug them, discipline them and mould them into sincere, genuine people, then you are a good mother. And the mark of a good mother? Children who love you too. (:
I posted my thoughts on GDNNOP. Just wanted to come say "hi" and thank you for a great piece. I think it resonated with a lot of folks. Keep up the great work! :-)
You are a great mom I am sure but I am not too sure they have a great dad. Why are you in the kitchen with an infant, 3 and 5 year old and your husband is fighting with you about having the kids in the kitchen. Dinner is an hour late? I guess so. Are you on his schedule or is he on YOURS. Sure he works all day but don't you? Since he doesn't see his kids all day, he should come home and take them off you hands or, better yet, make the dinner so you can go take a bath. I went thru this 16 years ago after giving birth. That is why I only have one. Why do we women insist our children have a mother who is present and a father who can pick and choose. I never understand why some women choose to live as single mothers even though they are married to the father of their children. Take care and wise up. I am not trying to attack you personally.
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